I've practically finished my book now. I just need to draw two more penises and a pair of boobs and I'm done. I hope people buy it. The woman that did Fifty Shades of Grey got loads of money for writing a load of fantasies that she made up to escape from her boring life. At least I'm living the dream, I can see a penis any time I want to. In fact, I can see one now as I can see into my neighbours window from here and he's walking round naked, like he thinks no one is watching him. What a total perv!
My old friend Neville used to live near to Deirdre from Coronation Street and she didn't have frosted windows in her bathroom. Well, not until Neville had his mates round and she got treated to lots of shouts of 'Deirdre's having a pooh'. I felt a bit sorry for her when he told me, but who doesn't have frosted glass in their toilet? That's asking for trouble. The only person I know that doesn't have them is Stinky Bernard, not since he slipped and fell headfirst into his window. The council boarded it up but he took it down. He says the lack of window reminds him of when he was a kid and his mum made him crap in the neighbours garden.
I haven't seen much of Oswald lately as he is doing a stripping tour around Holland it's called 'Nether Regions in the Netherlands' but he should be back soon. He sends me nice texts and photos of his cock which is nice but a bit boring really as it looks the same in each picture. I might suggest he starts putting mini hats on it, or drawing a face on it just so I know he's not sending the same photo over and over.
I'm finishing this here as I can smell a really horrible smell and it's putting me off.
